My Horses
I met Storm first... I was browsing the local sales website and saw her, called her owner, went to see her, knowing I couldn't afford her. I rode her. As an Arabian, she's very sensitive, but I thought we clicked. I told my husband I wasn't serious about buying her.
But I was serious about getting a horse. I kept browsing the ads... that was the year of the hay shortage and horses were available very inexpensively. Then I found Abbey for practically a song. She was a BLM mustang, captured in 2001 according to her brand, placing her at likely around 10 years old. She'd had a hard life. Captured in California, a clouded history, her former owners rescued her from slaughter. She was pregnant then. The daughter had ridden her English (I'd always ridden English and really prefer it), but she wasn't the jumper the daughter wanted, they told me. They told me she had issues with mounting, sometimes cantering. I never asked her to canter because I hadn't ridden in years and when I sort of asked, she just sped up at the trot. It was cool. We'd work on the issues.
I just had to find a place to keep her. I asked a friend I knew had a farm and he graciously agreed to let me keep her there with his cows (he had a second farm, which is where his three horses lived at the time).
Ab decided she was very much in charge of the cattle and herded them around mercilessly. We spent that first summer doing tons of Parelli and Clinton Anderson natural horsemanship stuff, and teaching her tricks. I went every day. Later that summer Bennett's horses Vengeance (I call her "V"), Jewel and Midnight came to live with Abbey. She established her her dominance pretty quickly. After filling out a Parellih "Horsenality" chart she was definitely, positively a Left Brain Introvert (LBI) .... bossy, too smart for her own good, unmotivated unless there is food involved, but all in all a sweet girl. She's not pushy with humans, for the most part.
My husband Russ had had no idea how smart and cool horses were, and he fell in love with her. He told me, that fall, that he was stealing my horse and I was going to have to find myself another one. I'd never dreamed that he'd share my dream.
So, I emailed Storm's owner (I had noticed she was still for sale several months later), and asked her if she'd consider taking payments on the Arab. She said she would. She said she thought things happened for a reason and I was meant to have her (I can't argue with this, now). So, at the end of 2010 Storm (my Christmas present, the best one I've ever gotten) joined the herd, bringing it to 5. She is a Right Brain Introvert (RBI) ... shy, gentle, sweet, sensitive.
So, I emailed Storm's owner (I had noticed she was still for sale several months later), and asked her if she'd consider taking payments on the Arab. She said she would. She said she thought things happened for a reason and I was meant to have her (I can't argue with this, now). So, at the end of 2010 Storm (my Christmas present, the best one I've ever gotten) joined the herd, bringing it to 5. She is a Right Brain Introvert (RBI) ... shy, gentle, sweet, sensitive.
When spring came in 2011, we'd made a good bit of progress with Abbey with the mounting issue, and Russ decided he wanted to learn to ride. Abbey is, potentially, a great first mount. She's not about to run off with anyone, it's pretty rare for her to spook, and she's interested in being with people. So, I put Russ up on her. The two of them were doing so well that I got excited and wanted to ride with him, so I tacked Storm up while he was riding around on Abbey in the back field.
Storm is pretty unflappable too but one thing that does freak her out is lead ropes dragging around. While I was lunging her a few times I dropped the rope, she spooked, and ran. She ran past Abbey twice, and on the third time Ab figured there must be something to be freaked about, so she ran. Russ, being inexperienced, bounced around on her back, which she HATES. She bucked. He came off. And broke his collarbone.
The months that followed were so challenging... Russ didn't have enough sick time built up to cover six weeks of recuperation, and although he said he didn't want to try riding again until he had some sick time built up, he did want to get back on (which amazes me). I personally took the accident pretty hard because I felt like I should've known better and not rushed things, and got him off Abbey as soon as Storm spooked. It shook my confidence in my ability with horses HARD.
Not long after that I hurt my neck and was told that I had degenerative disc disease and should have surgery. The neurosurgeon told me that if I fell from a horse I could be paralyzed for life. I lost all feeling in part of my right hand which meant the things I do for a living - typing medical transcription and making jewelry - were impossible for six weeks of my own recovery. Not being able to do those things scared me.
I didn't ride for three years after that, though I visit my horses regularly. Then I discovered an AMAZING doctor who actually listens. I told him what the neurosurgeon said. I told him, I'm not afraid of dying, I'm not afraid of pain, I'm afraid of hurting myself and not being able to do things I love.. but the fear is keeping me from doing the things I love. He showed me this quote:
“Life should not be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a pretty and well preserved body, but rather to skid in broadside in a cloud of smoke, thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and loudly proclaiming "Wow! What a Ride!”" -- Hunter S. Thompson
And, he showed me his own scar from his broken collarbone... which happened when he was jousting and took a fall from a horse.
On a followup visit, after reviewing my MRI, he told me that he thought I had Tension Myositis Syndrome, which means that my symptoms are caused by repressed emotions, though they are real, and that he thought I was no more likely to permanently injure myself in a fall from a horse than anyone else.
I felt on top of the world that day. It felt like my dreams had been given back to me.
Abbey had some scars to begin with, and the accident seems to have shaken her too. I went to visit her the day after Dr. Chertok told me this. We did some Parelli seven games stuff, simple things she knew pretty easily, and then I just sat with her. I realized that I was upset with her on a level I hadn't even been aware of. I said to her, "If you'll forgive me for the accident, I'll forgive you, and maybe we can start again." Well, when I said that, she started licking my hands and arms, and didn't stop for ten minutes, even after I took her halter off and turned her loose.
Storm is pretty unflappable too but one thing that does freak her out is lead ropes dragging around. While I was lunging her a few times I dropped the rope, she spooked, and ran. She ran past Abbey twice, and on the third time Ab figured there must be something to be freaked about, so she ran. Russ, being inexperienced, bounced around on her back, which she HATES. She bucked. He came off. And broke his collarbone.
The months that followed were so challenging... Russ didn't have enough sick time built up to cover six weeks of recuperation, and although he said he didn't want to try riding again until he had some sick time built up, he did want to get back on (which amazes me). I personally took the accident pretty hard because I felt like I should've known better and not rushed things, and got him off Abbey as soon as Storm spooked. It shook my confidence in my ability with horses HARD.
Not long after that I hurt my neck and was told that I had degenerative disc disease and should have surgery. The neurosurgeon told me that if I fell from a horse I could be paralyzed for life. I lost all feeling in part of my right hand which meant the things I do for a living - typing medical transcription and making jewelry - were impossible for six weeks of my own recovery. Not being able to do those things scared me.
I didn't ride for three years after that, though I visit my horses regularly. Then I discovered an AMAZING doctor who actually listens. I told him what the neurosurgeon said. I told him, I'm not afraid of dying, I'm not afraid of pain, I'm afraid of hurting myself and not being able to do things I love.. but the fear is keeping me from doing the things I love. He showed me this quote:
“Life should not be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a pretty and well preserved body, but rather to skid in broadside in a cloud of smoke, thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and loudly proclaiming "Wow! What a Ride!”" -- Hunter S. Thompson
And, he showed me his own scar from his broken collarbone... which happened when he was jousting and took a fall from a horse.
On a followup visit, after reviewing my MRI, he told me that he thought I had Tension Myositis Syndrome, which means that my symptoms are caused by repressed emotions, though they are real, and that he thought I was no more likely to permanently injure myself in a fall from a horse than anyone else.
I felt on top of the world that day. It felt like my dreams had been given back to me.
Abbey had some scars to begin with, and the accident seems to have shaken her too. I went to visit her the day after Dr. Chertok told me this. We did some Parelli seven games stuff, simple things she knew pretty easily, and then I just sat with her. I realized that I was upset with her on a level I hadn't even been aware of. I said to her, "If you'll forgive me for the accident, I'll forgive you, and maybe we can start again." Well, when I said that, she started licking my hands and arms, and didn't stop for ten minutes, even after I took her halter off and turned her loose.
All of us - me, Russ, Storm, Abbey - still have a long way to go on this journey (is there an end? hope not) to confidence and contentment, but our feet are back on the path. I'm convinced that my psychologists are four-legged and that time with them is the key to my spiritual, physical, mental and emotional rehabilitation. Art has a place in this equation too.... I want to capture the emotion and spirit that exists between people and horses, and other animals too. And I want to share it with the world. It feels like that is the contribution that I'm meant to make to the world.
Thanks for reading our story. I know you've got one too... I'd love to hear it.
The rest of the animals who share my journey...
Thanks for reading our story. I know you've got one too... I'd love to hear it.
The rest of the animals who share my journey...
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And a few who have journeyed on....
Several of these photos are courtesy of Magic of Memories Photography